We are Not Country Club People

I love going to my dad and stepmom’s country club.  They have awesome events from seasonal wine tastings to summer volleyball to Sunday barbeques.  The thing is, we don’t fit in.  We don’t have money and it shows.  We drive our dented, wheezing, on-its-last-breath car into the vast parking lot and the valets smile politely because they have to, but you know they’re thinking, “What is it, coupon day?”

Since I haven’t lost my baby weight yet, and I was 25 pounds overweight before I even got pregnant, my wardrobe is sadly lacking.  At the country club, the men can dress for golf, but the women are stylish and iced up.  I was wearing my Old Navy long orange maternity sundress with my Indian embroidered tunic from a Santa Barbara beach street fair, and flip-flops.  We made the very embarrassing to my father mistake of walking through the main building to the outdoor area, because I’d never entered the club any other way.  The looks on the faces of the people having appetizers in the bar area said it all: FAUX PAS.

When we arrived, my sister and her friend from college were dressed appropriately.  She in a cute little cocktail number with heels, and he in a suit, jacket off, with a brightly colored button down.  Odie and I looked like we were… well, dressed for a day at the pool – which we were.  But we forgot we were dressing for the COUNTRY CLUB pool.  My sister Brooke grew up coming to this place and she has an ease about her while there that I will never have.  She does, however, have bright blue hair.  She rocks.

I don’t feel bad that I crashed a child’s party on the lawn because I wanted my daughter to be able to run around on the grass.  It’s not like I ate their food, jumped in their bouncy house, or invaded the petting zoo.  Maybe I have no class compared to these people, no 10 carat diamond tennis bracelet to remind me of my affair with my tennis instructor, but so be it.   Baby V had a wonderful time swimming and chasing after other children.  The children didn’t seem to notice her onesie was from Target.

Next time I’ll pull on a nice dress and some strappy sandals, so I don’t embarrass my father.  We’ll come in through the back service entrance.  And I’ll have a very strong martini.

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About Mrs Odie

Like you, only funnier.
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4 Responses to We are Not Country Club People

  1. mrsk6 says:

    I was grinding my teeth reading this because I can imagine how you feel! I’ve never been to a country club, but you just described how I feel going pretty much anywhere most days because I never feel appropriately dressed, for anything. I even feel a little embarassed sitting around the house dressed the way I am!

  2. Cindy says:

    Love the photo! I never fit in at those places either…

  3. John says:

    GOLF = Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden — true original Scottish definition, now you know. In the 60’s, 70’s, 80’s, they barred many more. Some very exclusive ones of course, would have their tokens. But would have elaborate systems of sponsorship to keep from more ofthe Others from coming in. Sad time for the USA, but it’s all good. It takes time to properly correct wrongs. But what I’m not getting is the person in the water was a woman? 🙂

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