The past week, I’ve been deeply absorbed in the task of parenting two children while following the Dr. Conrad Murray trial. I record it during the day and watch on and off while I do housework or nurse. Today I folded laundry and listened to the prosecutor question the defense’s “expert” witness. The witness was deliciously uncooperative on cross, and our prosecutor, Walgren, got terse. It was good television.
Apparently there has been in-fighting on the defense team. Chernoff is the lead attorney, but he often seems downright unprepared. He doesn’t have documents he needs and he appears to break the holy grail of defense law: never ask a question you don’t know the answer to. His own witnesses are making the prosecution’s case.
The guy brought in to deal with medical testimony, Flannagin, is so unlikable, that even though the maximum sentence on the table is four years, I think this jury is going to give Dr. Murray the chair.
The defendant has a look of bewilderment in good moments. In bad moments, he looks like he’s wondering if he is being punked.
Having two children is not twice as hard as having one. It’s more like four times as hard. I’m at a great phase with Pringles where we spend the mornings staring at each other like infatuated teens, but simultaneously I’m at a place with Viva where there is much foot stomping and screaming “NO!”
I’m so grateful Odie is putting the little foot-stomper to bed for me tonight. My back is killing me and I’m enjoying a much needed glass of wine while I write. Today was a big day. I put Pringles down for tummy time and left the room to get something. When I returned, she was on her back, wide-eyed, like “How the hell did that happen?” I put her back on her tummy and watched her roll onto her back. She rolls! Damnit. Now I have to stop putting her on the couch and leaving the room. Well, I knew this day would come.
The days are going by too fast. I want to be with her every moment. She will sleep in her cosleeper now if I put her there, but I want her in the same room with me, where I can look over at her and listen to her sigh in her sleep. She spends the last few hours of her day in the swing beside me while I watch TV or read. It is painful to have her away from me.
Now that I’m on Zoloft, it’s painful in a normal way, not in a demons-are-eating-her-alive-in-front-of-me way.
I’m learning to focus on the positive a little more. In fact, I think that my negativity was chemical. I’ve been so completely happy and bliss-filled that I really want to start writing about the joy and magic I find in everyday experiences.
I’m just fucking with you.
Want to know what is irritating me today? The misuse of the word “definition.” For example, a woman I know wrote about how she did something idiotic and then said, “I am the definition of stupidity.” No, you are the exemplification of stupidity, Stupid.
See? Same old me.